Deserter-Turned-Star Psychiatrist

In your recently published book (titled "The man") you write that in the old days, the wars also gave an opportunity to prove one’s courage. Does this mean that in today’s world a war, and within that, the military can be a good means of proving one’s courage?

It is a difficult question. In this form, there isn’t a clear answer to it. Since soldiers execute an order, and what has to be decided is how much courage is needed to execute an order? Moreover, we also have to differentiate aggressive war from defensive war. For courage is essential to an attack, but also to firm defence. But I’d rather define the concept of courage as follows: one always finds himself face to face with his fears, just like a soldier does in a certain case. If this person – the soldier – overcomes his fears, then we can call it courage.

Is there a difference between male and female troops in this respect? What can it be that motivates women to join the service as combat vehicle drivers or fighter pilots for example?

The dolls’ case is somewhat different than the guys’. When a girl decides that she wants to prove her skills in a masculine field, it can be traced back to the eternal conflict between man and woman. She wants to prove it to herself and her environment alike. By the way girl troops may mean extra motivation, even within the team. Even though they may have disadvantages as regards their physical performance, in most of the cases their mental strength is greater and this can be encouraging for the guys as well. Their ability to tolerate monotony is much stronger, which is an advantage for them during the trainings and in their job and it can boost their performance.

Do you have any personal experience? Have you been a soldier?

We have time.

I was studying at the medical university in Budapest as a Hungarian living in Vojvodina (Vajdaság), with a Yugoslavian citizenship. I started university in 1985 and graduated in 1992. In the meantime the war in the Balkans (Southern Slavic war) broke out and since I was enlisted right after secondary school it was obvious that they would also take me to fight as soon as I graduate from the university. For in terms of the law, attending school meant postponement. Today I also admit that in my final academic year I didn’t turn up on my last three exams on purpose, just to repeat the year. I was hoping that the war would end by then. But it didn’t… What is more, since the secret services had up-to-date information concerning their citizens studying abroad, on the day following my state exam the postman was already delivering the call-up papers to my parents’ address. I will never forget it: my state exam was on a Wednesday, in the summer of 1992. I would have gone home to my parents the following day, but my mother called me and said I shouldn’t go because the draft is already there. I didn’t receive it. Neither that one nor the ones that arrived later. This is how I became a registered deserter in Yugoslavia…

Would you tell us the reasons? Did you have moral concerns regarding the military, or perhaps you are an incurable pacifist? Or this wasn’t your war…

Rather the latter. I didn’t feel that I had to take part in this, it wasn’t my war, I wouldn’t have had to defend my own nation… I had no problems with the military, I had plans that after graduation I would get compulsory enlisted service over and done with. In peacetime, of course. In fact when later I received the Hungarian citizenship, I went to the Hungarian Defence Forces and they entered my name in the records.

Nevertheless, this period couldn’t have been easy for you psychically. Your parents were on the other side of the border, you couldn’t visit them… how long did this situation last?

I couldn’t go home for nine and a half years. Until I was granted amnesty. You are right, it wasn’t easy, mainly because physically it isn’t a great distance. Perhaps it would have been easier if I had lived thousands of kilometers from here, on the other side of the world. But this way I was conscious of the fact that my home is closer to me than Debrecen for instance, and I still can’t go home. Of course my parents visited me during this period, we could meet more or less regularly. After the war I had several cases when former soldiers, mercenaries who participated in the war contacted me. They were asking me to help them process the things they have undergone… It is a hard work, often we talk about wounds that last several decades or even a lifetime. It is difficult to process if someone sees his mate dying or happens to see the man shot by him dying.

They can never process that. According to surveys conducted in foreign countries, the suicide rates for example sharply increase among soldiers returning from war zones. Mainly in case of those who took part in serious battles.

In these post-traumatic cases there may even be deeply buried, dark secrets lingering around. It is a serious trauma in itself that people are dying around me, but in case of a soldier-opponent situation the thing is obvious: either you shoot or you get shot. But when the civilians get mixed up in the story… I have also come across one or two cases when the other party started to mention things concerning the war in Yugoslavia that indicated that what they were not only about the military action. But when I asked them directly, they denied it firmly and strenuously. For we are talking about war crimes here, which still entail serious punishment, so despite the doctor-patient relation they would never dare to admit it. But of course, this is not about war crimes only. Young people have a tendency to think that they are gods, they are omnipotent, and nothing bad can happen to them. When they go into battle they know that they can die, of course, but they don’t believe that seriously. Then they face reality. Even the corps they serving in can make a difference. Because if one is a pilot, he doesn’t realize that much that when he releases the bomb, people will die down there. When the Americans dropped the A-bomb, up in the air the pilots were smiling and taking pictures of each other. When they saw the consequences, there were some who had a breakdown and quit the military. But for an infantryman, the picture is much clearer: he immediately faces the attacks, the combat, death, and wounds. Even if he escapes physically unharmed, he sees his mates dying and sometimes he even sees the people killed by him.

You have also mentioned that the military can also have a character forming power. What is it precisely that you had in mind?

Yes, I do believe that today’s young people can benefit from military education. Although the majority of the parents – with the exception of a few, whom I really respect – have a negative image of the military, they wouldn’t willingly let their "little" child join the service. By the way this is exactly one of the main problems with raising a child today: most of the parents spoil their kids and work their arses off to give them everything they want. In addition to that, kissing ass – pardon my French – merged with parental inconsistence is a straight road to prevent their children from becoming mentally sound, balanced, happy adults. In the military, under the command of a good leader, they may be given a chance to learn to work for their success. Step by step, starting from the bottom… But everything they achieve this way is the result of their work alone, and the feeling of success is one of the most important motivating powers in today’s world.